Moments matter
It seems to be a period of loss for many families and friends, as so many dearly beloved have recently passed away. After a period of time set aside to mourn and digest the unthinkable, each of these unfortunate dates will become anniversary days where we stop, check and reflect. Time passes and yet certain dates remain etched in our minds as critical and pivotal moments in our lives. A reminder of a specific day, a particular hour or a split second when everything changed. Today is such a day.
The traditional and reasonable response during these reflections is that life is short and we must make the most of it and to tell those we love, that we love them. This is true and yet we often only embrace it during the grief period then forget it when life carries on, as it does. We also often think of living out this mantra in big bold statements or actions that cement life and our friendship bonds. When someone we know passes away, upon hearing the news we immediately think of the last time we saw them, then expand the memories with added visions and moments as we deal with the devastation and sadness. Often these immediate memories are not of extraordinary experiences but rather casual encounters. I think that we sell many precious moments short by not giving enough meaning and sincerity to the time we do get to spend with each other, however brief. I believe we need to make the moments we take for granted, count. Each one has significance, we just don’t know it at the time. They somehow become miniscule in the greater scheme of things and yet we are missing a trick here. Every second counts because there is always an interaction of some sort playing out in every moment. We need to pay attention.
When you shake someone’s hand, mean it. Be sincere and appreciate the moment and the exchange. When you hug someone, do it properly. You are the closest person in the world to them at that moment, acknowledge it. When you greet someone, greet with intent. Whether it be a stranger, a friend or a family member, give the exchange the significance it deserves. Each of these encounters can and will be part of reflections and remembrance that you will, in all probability, only attach true meaning to at the moment you realise they will no longer be possible. It is a sobering thought. Respect your interactions and respect the moments when they happen. If you do, you may well find that your heart will swell with appreciation of the way you felt at the time, when you are thinking back on the encounter that can now never be repeated. You may also find that the effort you put in at the time turned random moments and encounters into memories to cherish. Maybe it is as simple as this – Be sincere in your approach, appreciate time shared, either given or taken, and acknowledge the value of the occasion.
How often we regret flippancy in the past, which cannot be recreated. How often we pledge meaning for the future, which is not promised. Combine the two and let them meet in the moments we live, which is now.
A Toast to absent family and friends, while there may not be a clinking of two glasses, there are most certainly two people in my thoughts, me and you. Cheers