Modern Day Keys to Happiness
“They say a person needs just three things to be truly happy in this world: someone to love, something to do, and something to hope for” Tom Bodett
It turns out that while Tom was on the right track, the simplification of the pillars of happiness has sadly and unfortunately become outdated and in need of more clarity in certain regards and most certainly a few specific additions.
Contrary to or even complimentary to Mazlow’s hierarchy of needs, are some fundamental building blocks for happiness in the modern world we eek our existence in. Yes that statement is contradictory in some respects but it’s because there seem to be more “WTF?” moments these days than any other, almost as though we don’t actually have a clue what we want. Basically, our world is now built not on wants or needs but rather rights. Unfortunately, the focus is so weighted on giving rights or defending rights – Ironically from those on the right half of politics and who are deemed not right – that all those not in the spotlight, find themselves standing in line to lose their rights, or have their rights nullified, by virtue of the fact that the rights of others are now more important and take precedence. To take things even further, these days rights can be taken away simply because of the actions of departed descendants, generations ago.
Having someone to love is a treasure and at times a luxury because often those we love leave our lives for whatever reason, none more so that becoming dearly departed. More often than not this love never leaves us and we keep the memories alive by feeding it regularly. This makes us happy.
Having something to do gives us purpose and justifies our existence through achievement, some of which is not aligned to pride. These days having something to do is also a luxury because it equates to having a job amidst all the unemployment and this empowers us with purchasing power to put food on the table and provide for our families and friends, again with the pride removed. This makes us happy.
Having something to hope for is perhaps the biggest luxury of all in that there are those that are driven to give it up. Hope is not the desire for a result or the holding thumbs for chance. Hope is a belief that there will be an improvement from one minute to the next and, failing that, from one hour to the next, and failing that still, having the intrinsic optimism that there is a way for things to get better. Hope takes a greater understanding to enjoy and appreciate its value and if one is fortunate enough then it can be experienced as it should. This makes us happy.
The word I submit as one to trump all the ‘keys’ to happiness as mentioned above is belonging. Having somewhere, be it place or circumstance, where you feel you belong. Once you feel you belong where you are, there is no need to fight or take flight because there will be ease and comfort in the knowledge that your existence is validated simply by existing. When you are in a position where you feel a sense of belonging you will spend less energy fighting, hating and shouting and more energy on looking after yourself and those around you. The trouble with this sense of belonging is that the world is becoming so marginalised that people overlook the simple desire to belong in lieu of fighting for a right to be included.